Purification of the Nafs

(published in Vol I #2 July Newsletter...Halka al Hazrati, Qadiri Rifa'i Inayati Order of Grass Valley, Ca., talk C)

by Shaykh Ezra Ahmed Muhsin

If a person comes out of a hell realm, merely being in agony would be like a paradise. I want to say a couple of things about the nafs, the ego centers. There are levels of nafs. This is a subject that is very near and dear to me, because I think I have to work on it harder than most. One of the things about doing this kind of spiritual work is that a lot of the time you can be caught up in something, and you can perceive what is going on as the truth, but it may be a truth that is colored by that particular level of the nafs in which you are caught. And depending upon the particular level, something that is true at one time, well, it is false at another time. As you progress, what was once true, is no longer true for you.

A thief finally gets down to the point where every time he goes to a restaurant, on the way out he'll take fifteen mints. You just can't do that anymore. Before he graduated from being a thief, taking the extra complimentary mints wasn't such a bad deal. As a person progresses on the path their views change. It becomes more and more incumbent upon them to look at everything that they do, everything that they say, a little more carefully. The margin for transgressions becomes finer and finer as they progress.

There is a saying on the Sufi path: "The vices of a saint are as the virtues of an ordinary man."

The thought of Jesus stealing a penny from his mother....that is an impossible thought! And spiritual work can get even subtler than that. A Christ would not even have the thought cross his mind! This, (even the thought,) could be considered the sin of impurity with the saints. And when you get to the point where the truth becomes that critical for you, then the absolute truth beomes necessary to your way of being. The smallest indiscretion, kills the saint's soul. And while you are working on (your indiscretions), they come into your thoughts! The Buddhists have a practice of looking at your thoughts, noting them, and then letting them go. But while you are noting your thoughts...you think to yourself..." I didn't even know I was having thoughts like these." So, our spiritual practice can get subtler and subtler. Be on your toes, observe everything, observe your reactions to life, observe what actions you take, and where your motivation is coming from when you do take action. The work is endless, I am still working on my ego. Mashallah, asGod wills, I will get better and better at it. Then I can be of more help to others. When a person is in the position that I am in, that is what they must do.

We had a big get together with Baba Taner and someone said, "Allah does not make mistakes." Taner said, "Ahhh...I don't know about that!" The man was horrified, "What do you mean, how can you say that Allah makes mistakes?" "Well...look! He makes me a shaykh?" I can tell you, it gets worse as you are given spiritual responsibility, it does not get better. "Oh I am a hot-dog now. I've got this really great hat, and this fancy robe to wear, and people are kissing my hand, this is a great job!" NO! The job is lousy, because you have to become that.

When I was in the Navy I got a promotion. I got a hat, and it had what we called scrambled eggs (gold braid) on it. It was weird. I was at the Naval Station in Long Beach California, it was the weekend. I was aboard a ship named the Cayuga. We were all "buddies-hail-fellow-well-met," everything was great. On a Tuesday night I got my promotion. The next weekend I was at the Cayuga and the only thing different was the color of my collar pins had changed, the little leaf was silver not gold. I was'nt wearing my fancy hat. I walked up to see my "good buddies" on the Cayuga and as I came to the top of the ladder, a sailor snapped to attention. Another sailor blew on the ship's whistle.....OOOoooooWWWwweeeeee! Another sailor rang the bell...Ding Ding! Ding Ding! So....I quickly jumped aside to see who was coming up the ladder behind me. Because they do this for the flag officers. If you are a Lieutenant Comander you don't get it, if you are a Commander you do. I jumped to let the officer behind me go ahead. There wasn't anyone in back of me. I felt so stupid ! All that had changed was my collar pins.

That night I went to the Officer's Club and I couldn't put my hat on the rack where I had been putting my hat for many years, because it was not my hat rack anymore. It had to go over there with all of the hats with the gold braid on them. I was embarassed. The next time I saw my commanding officer, I asked him if I could get a demotion. I said, "I don't want to be a Commander, I am not one of the guys anymore. The Lieutenant Commander can hang out with the guys, but wearing this hat is something else. Is there any chance that I can become a Lieutenant Commander again?" He replied, "No...No, you cannot. This is what you are." I said, "No...it is not what I am...all these bells,whistles, salutes, and instantaneous respect. I'm not that, it isn't me." He said, "Well, let me tell you, that hat is going to bring you a lot of respect, however, you are going to have to grow into that hat before that respect is really yours......" I am still growing. Because the responsibility is awesome. Before you only looked out for yourself, then when you become an officer you must look out for the other guy. Then you might have to look out for everybody on the ship. All of a sudden every single life on the ship is your responsibility. Plus the added one of the ship itself, all of the machinery and everything that goes with it. Do you know why the Captain goes down with the ship? I'll tell you. Because you are responsible for your government property. And if you lose something, you will pay for it. Can you imagine losing a destroyer, much less an aircraft carrier? That is why the Captain goes down with the ship. Because they are responsible for everyone's life and they want to be the last one off.

So, responsibility can become awesome, if you think of the depth of it. And that is just what it is like in the Navy, never mind in spiritual life. Sometimes I wish it was Shaykh Taner sitting here instead of me. But then, I know Taner, he wishes it was Nuruddin instead of him. When Nuruddin was sitting there, he wished it was Muhyiuddin Ansari. It is interesting how it works, we'll work on this together...Inshallah!

Did you know that Pakistan was a part of India until the liberation? This problem between them is actually centuries old. "The Hindus hate the Moslems, and the Moslems hate the Hindus, and the Catholics hate the Protestants, and everybody hates the Jews." That is a Tom Lehrer lyric. It is just insanity! Some of the greatest people of India, like Ghandi, their work was the brotherhood work. Jan Fishan was one and of course there was Akbar who was a great Saint of India. It didn't make any difference if you were a Jew, a Moslem, a Hindu, a Sikh, a Buddhist, or a Jain. He would not permit anyone to discriminate. He put together an India in which everyone could grow up together in peace side by side. It worked well, then he died. A couple of generations go by, and everything is forgotten. Then you have to wait for another Akbar to come along. There have always been teachers and exemplars who never let go of the ethic of brotherhood.

The truth is what is important, all of these different paths can bring people to realization. That is what it is all about, bringing people to God. What is truly important is the "realization," not how they got there. Sometimes, the process takes place in a small group, sometimes in a larger one. In the time of Akbar it took place in a universal setting. Of course he had his enemies. "NO! We want to do it this way." Of course I guess that is the way it has to be. There is a hadith of the Prophet Mohammed saws which says, "If everything in the world suddenly become perfect...Allah would have to end it. " Why? Because there would be no purpose, no glorification of the person progressing spiritually.

Question: So, even though Allah created the world of duality. He still expects us to do what is right and see it as a unity?

Answer: Precisely! Because He gave us the law, the scriptures, (no matter who's scriptures) and He gave us the right to choose. The scriptures all say the same things..."Be nice, work hard, and do the right thing."

But then, on the levels of the nafs, on one level you may be doing the right thing, and on the next level you are in a mess. That is why they call it "spiritual evolution." So that is what it is all about.